Open letter to God

Dear God,

This is going to be a really tough letter to write. I mean, the world has changed, dude. Most young people don't believe you exist. When in doubt, they google you, and you know what? Your PR guys need to be sacked for complete and total misrepresentation ; check out the rubbish thrown up by the search engine. Depressing stuff, man. Totally not cool.

It's about time you got smart and joined some social networking sites. Tweet away, darling. We want the real thing. Gyaan in your own words. And no special privileges for being God – 140 characters like everybody else, okay? Set up a Facebook account – don't you want to know how many ‘friends' you have on earth? Get your own interactive website and watch the fun.

Business first. Where were you when we in India needed you the most? I mean the country was holding its collective breath on September 30, waiting for ‘The Verdict' . Anything could have happened, who can restrain our hotheaded netas but your good self? But you were Missing In Action: nowhere on the scene, leading to much confusion as various groups fought over your official residence . Silly people! Every child in the world knows you prefer to live in the hearts of believers. What's the fuss over a monument? Do you really need one? Have you ever needed one?

As for the haalat of those three judges, they were landed with the toughest job in the world. Imagine being asked to decide which grand abode is your personal preference – a new temple or a demolished mosque? Nobody thought of asking you. If the monument is meant to please you, surely you should have a say in the matter ? Speak your mind while there is still time.

Fortunately, young people are more in tune with sensible solutions. Not for them the futile exercise of proving that this is indeed your favourite hang out. This generation is pretty smart. To them it doesn't really matter whether they party in this disco or that. So long as they have a good time.

This is your moment, God. Get up and do your thing. Strut your stuff. Throw some attitude . Tell those feuding fellas, you'll have none of it. They may ignore you completely since in any case you are incidental to this manmade controversy. There are so many worthier issues that need immediate and urgent intervention . Our bachchas need schools, colleges and toilets. Mandirs and masjids do not help their cause, but temples of learning do. Advise them to open their eyes to India's new realities; our restless youngsters are not interested in the politics of religion. They'll settle for jobs and a better life, any day.

Three judges had the unenviable task of decoding the sentiments of a billion-plus people. The judgment is apolitical and bold. Who can possibly please and appease almost one-fifth of humanity? Not even you. There is talk of ‘reconciliation' but nobody is saying what exactly that means. Besides, can there be a board meeting without the chairman , which is you? Better that we put this centuries-old issue behind us as quickly as possible before a foreign hand stirs up trouble. What say? Till then, you can chill.

-Shobha De, TOI
Original article here

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Devil sent the rain blues

It's been a hot couple of weeks and today it rained. Heavy. And beautiful. Just like back home. Bombay. I love the monsoons. I love getting wet in the Bombay rains. I love driving in the rain. I love to see the raindrops falling on the ground. The rain reminds me of Bombay. Of home. Of the smell of mud. Of my childhood. Of the gum boots I used to wear to school. Of wet socks and being too scared to take my shoes off in school to dry them. Of running to hide from lightning. Of Sid falling in the gutter and stinking all the way home. Of going to movietime to watch Dil Se with Karthik. Of Chaiyya Chaiyya.

The stalkee has reignited a spark somewhere. I have not felt this way in many fortnights. I know its not meant to be but I am going to enjoy this. Look forward to the weekend. Look forward to a sighting. To a conversation. To being left alone again.

I wanna walk in the rain again. I wanna be soaked again. I wanna hold and be held again.


S

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